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Well, slightly less than a month ago this guy in a Guy Fawkes mask tried to blow it up.

Actually, I think it was agent Smith.

hmmm...interesting, you learn something new everyday. Let me tell you something from the world of nature so I may inform my bretheren. Polar bears are a bunch of little biatches. I still have PTSD from my last encounter with one.

You shouldn't blame the polar bears for your psychological sufferings, as a Freudian I'm sure it's all related to your tusk size.

I like Trains..............

Hey look... I'm winning!

Look at CBJ, coming in here with his Uber Member title thinking he's all that.

Wally, tusk!

Hey Stan, I agree, trains are cool. JBC, you are bringing us down a road I would rather not travel. You know Svinger has a mancrush on mme and I do not want to give him any ideas.

Trains ARE cool! And you can't stop a man from having ideas. I think therefor I...

Assino, do you know any of these guys? I think one of them is delivering my mail - I keep finding mail hidden in odd spots on the property. Since we are in the rainy season this does not bode well for my post items. (especially the instant space army I ordered from Marvin the Martian)

If you never see your mailman, chances are he is either a Ninja or a VORTEX DECK.

The mailman being a vortex deck doesn't make any sense. What you should have said was "...or trapped in a VORTEX".

Are you good for anything other than disposing of rotten fish and dancing?

Ah sorry, I'll tell them to just leave your mail in the box.

Hey Assy, how much would you charge me to take out Svinger.

Hmm, my going rate per assassination is 5,000 Florins. So for a friend I can knock it down to 4,500.

Alright, I will throw in a VORTEX DECK if you make it look like an accident.

Tonight, Svinger Cabrazzi sleeps with the fishes.

I'm currently taking a small vacation in Asgard, good luck getting in here without an invite.

Wally, I've got a spot reserved for you next to your grandpa.

what was the famous rant from George Carlin? the one where he said a bunch of cuss-words?

Different quote, but tons of curse-words nonetheless. "I'm very sorry the government taxes their tips, that's fucked up. That ain't my fault. It would seem to me that waitresses are one of the many groups the government fucks in the ass on a regular basis. Look, if you ask me to sign something that says the government shouldn't do that, I'll sign it, put it to a vote, I'll vote for it, but what I won't do is play ball. And as for this non-college bullshit you're givin' me, I got two words for that: learn to fuckin' type, 'cause if you're expecting me to help out with the rent you're in for a big fuckin' surprise."
-Mr Pink (Reservoir Dogs)

That's it, I'm out. You guys brought up Smurfs, you win.

[Sung by Smurfs in unison]

La la la-la la la,
Sing a happy song.
La la la-la la la,
Smurf your whole day long.

[Whistled]
La la la-la la la

[Papa Smurf speaks]
Smurf along with me!

[Whistled]
La la la-la la la

[Papa Smurf speaks]
Simple as can be.

[Sung by Smurfs in unison]
Next time you're feeling blue just let a smile begin,
Happy things will come to you...

[Smurfette speaks]
So smurf yourself a grin!

[Ominous Gargamel music]
[Gargamel speaks]
Oooooo I hate Smurfs!

[Azrael meows]
[Gargamel speaks]
I'll get you, I'll get all of you if it's the last thing I ever do! hehehehe!

[Sung by Smurfs in unison]
La la la-la la la,
Now you know the tune,

[Harmony Smurf plays the "la la la-la la la" tune (barely) on his off-key trumpet]
[Sung by Smurfs in unison, accentuated for finale]
You'll be Smurfing soon!

Too fuckin' funny once you get the joke! That song is dirty!

Always look on the bright side of life, Da dun
Always look on the light side of life, Da Dun

Lifes a piece of shit when you really look at it.

(Monty Python)

Monty Python is overrated.

Assassino13 wrote:Monty Python is overrated.

I'd agree that some of it is (due to the strange sense of humor the Brits have), but certain parts are just pure gold.

Assy critiques Python but quotes Smurfs. Looks like I need an assassin to take out an assassin.

walrus wrote:Assy critiques Python but quotes Smurfs. Looks like I need an assassin to take out an assassin.

Wanna go dutch on it?

Mmmm...dutch, I take that as a suggestion I take out two people. Yes, I will gladly throw you under the bus as well.

Oh ok then. Good luck trying to pay for two hits with your rotten fish.

Hey for only 1.5x times the price of a normal hit I'll commit seppuku.

I'll give you triple if you take out Svinger and then Hari Kari yourself. Take out Dazz as well, she is being a little biatch lately.